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Tynes

by Tamara Sandor

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1.
Tines 05:46
Tines old drifter plagued with hiccups found God thus stricken shot up sickened and saw the ever-lengthening rhythm the ever-gaping maw when you hold your breath I find that I can breathe heavy stone Adonis lying beside me desiring nothing and in the absence of your flapping child’s wiles my tea-light heart can hear itself humming with a heat that is wild …………………………… quick men! undam the rivers! of pens pockmarked from chewing on those gloomy gothic truths I read in the tiles quick! can I be delivered? sharpened my teeth on fresh young poplars and now I gotta watch that smile ……………………………… lo! and behold! new moss managed to grow on those glowing old photographs we thought we tacked to the wall that backs onto time and now I fear that if I turn my mind away from the cradle my babe will sprout coarse and vicious tines or worse still, I will just guiltlessly forget that he is mine ……………………………… oh little lady it’s okay but it ain’t like a train don’t let their guitar playing fool you oh little lady it is a boon but you cannot tune it to your style it comes to you barbed and unbridled …………………………… oh my love oh my love you root and root to touch just what is mute in me I’m quitting, this is my last pack of epiphanies I will wait til the end of my days for it to hit me
2.
Magpie 04:02
Magpie Magpie knows she’s on fire, She found a flower in a ripe death o’ swamp somewhere, Wide-eyed at her luminous prize, She cries in the hot night air. Poise and shape and petal and smell, She stands transfixed in a crystalline spell, The power and poison of beauty compel, When you know how to love so well. Loon says, “Take care of yourself! Take care of yourself, my dear.” Loon lolls lonely along the shore, She doesn’t sing anymore, All for the love of a bear, Feeds fast on skittish and shallow fare. Minnows in the muck, all disrupted, upswept, At the slightest kick-step of a foot thus webbed, “Curse my clumsiness! Damn my head! That can’t even get herself fed.” Then ‘long comes blackbear, end o’ the day, Sayin,’ “Loon, I love to see you flop around that way, Just step into my broad and bountiful arms, And I’ll never let you come to harm.” Magpie says, “There ain’t no good way,” Back to the deep and find your prey. Hey girl, there ain’t no good way, Everything ends this way.” See the pie fly, paintbrush tail, down from her Domed home high in a treetop, brimmin’ with the Treasure she treasures till they’re spoilt and stale, And leaves the old nest to the small hawks. “But the madness, Mag, of tenderness turned to slay That caressed just yesterday We had plans…” “Well did you hear that the deer, whether doe or stag, When she’s all done runnin’ ‘cross plains and crags, And the skittishness slips from her bones, She locks eyes with the wolf, all alone, And they agree all’s fair and planned, And they share some prayer of the land. “You step out the palace, and there’s no malice in a world of sand.” Magpie says, “There ain’t no good way,” Back to the deep and find your prey. Hey girl, there ain’t no good way, Everything ends this way.” Loon says, “Take care of yourself! Take care of yourself, my dear.”
3.
Blood Memory 03:48
Blood Memory Back in the back of my lair bludgeoning doves, Pain’s got to go somewhere, and it does Romanticomic situations in apartments in New York I leave my body for a second and the day’s turned into dark I need to get some walls around it, push it through my arteries If there’s another way, I’ll do it, it came to me readymade I don’t know why it works, where I learned it, or how to make it pay Feeling overflows the form it knows and the Chord cuts both ways I’m gonna work it out, I told my brother so We found it in my mouth, a lump of solid gold That was one hour and a half ago and it’s turned Tinny and cold tinny and cold tinny and cold But the skin enfolding my face and tits and feet and fingers fights The same fight’s been fought for four eons ‘gainst equilibrium, I must abide I must get on the right side of it
4.
a thousand holes there’s a thousand holes to hide in there’s a thousand holes to fall through I’ve been in a few of ‘em you have too there’s a thousand reasons to say no there’s a thousand reasons to stay in you ask me why I say these things it’s so you know remember when I was alone sitting in the snake pit, becoming stone remember when I came unstrung walked down the street, felt naught but heated spit of lashing foreign tongues there are times we’ve ground such fresh-laid soil into a mound with toes and fled but we got songs for when the time comes to remind us to forget so baby let’s relent, caress the surfaces, encourage this perfect and proverbial body to rise and set I learned that falling stars favour wishes washed-out and inarticulate I hope we go pretty far I hope we get to the fruit of it
5.
Walls 04:12
Walls Smell of earth, soil upturned I wrote you a letter bright and sharp as a spade and you answered from the grave You said “Yeah, we should’ve fucked when we had the chance” We met at his last party sonny_boy has one new friend Such an end could not be imagined there, No kind of end for a gentleman satyr, with his love for the ladies. Not in front of the ladies! I’ve been waitin I’ve been waitin for this For this curse, for this curse to lift Old Elijah, callin me out, smellin of hickory and trout Old Elijah, callin me out, smellin of hickory and trout... The chick cocked her head, said “baby count to ten,” and disappeared into the morning Back safe in bed, she counted up the cash, happy it happened and happy to get out while she still can, Thinkin she’s winnin, thinkin she was winnin, Havin it both ways, havin it both ways, Like a queen, like a queen...
6.
Columbus 06:31
columbus if i am a flower and i may be a flower i’ve been in bloom only once and it was with you if i am a loon and i may be a loon i sang to the moon only once and the moon was you if i am a fire and i may be a fire i have been stoked only once and it was by you if i am a baby and i may be a baby i have been rocked only once and it was by you There is no carnival, There’s lost, and there is home, And when the art falls apart, Things stand singular as stones. if i’m a mosquito and i may be a mosquito i have drawn blood only once and the blood was you if i am an otter and i may be an otter i swam in the water only once and the water was you if i am a knoll and i may be a knoll i have been grassy only once and the grass was you if i’m a machine and i may be a machine i have been oiled only once and it was by you Remember in the forest, Where all is wordless and porous, And the water finds the seed, And you do get what you need, Your windy wild spirit is cut out for this time, Go Columbus! Go See It! just don’t lose your mind and please! don’t forget me! please! don’t forget me when you’re fine— you will be fine
7.
A Date 05:21
A Date We made a date to dance along the floor of the sea to hold hands in the soft, molten heat where all lines meet We rode along astride horses whose senses were gone We watched the gathering armies We skipped off and ripped off the country To live in the trees //////////////////// “Carry it off, light as a cloth of Egyptian blue” That’s what the god of terror and love told me to do I know the light splits and frays And flesh turns to fresh, cold clay But losing everything, my king, is ok /////////////////// We showed up late, de-clawed, mottled and grey, ate some remainder of cake and called it a day We built a nest of blackness where nothing can bleed But I have not yet finished falling down on my knees

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released April 19, 2016

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Tamara Sandor Montreal, Québec

songwriting someone time is a circle

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